Another Writer Dilemma: Help

I've just submitted the second in my St. Louis Blues series. Blood Lust will follow up on Toccata, with my protagonists emerging from the aftermath of the Sera incident. The third book, A Fatal Flaw, is on the drawing board. I know where it's going and how it will get there.

Here's my dilemma; I always get the feeling of being adrift aboard a powerless, rudderless, boat in the deep blue sea after a book is finished (other than editing). I'm coming out of a particularly good period of writing, and I'd like nothing more than to extend it as far as possible. For the life of me, I can't make myself sit at the keyboard and create.

It's all I can do today to pen this SOS to my readers. Maybe it's Spring Fever. I know that phenomenon exists; I get it every year, but usually a lot later than this. I mean, for crying out loud, we just made it to March. My grass is a good two weeks from needing its first haircut of the season, and that's when SF generally hits hardest. And I don't mean science fiction.

I guess you can consider this a SF SOS. Before we get irretrievably lost in alphabet soup, I need to make an announcement regarding Toccata. Originally slated for an April release, it is now on schedule for a May 20th debut. I'd planned a series of blogs and other posts to lead up to its release, so that is now in a holding pattern over the runway.

That could be another reason for my hopefully transient case of the doldrums. At any rate, I'll get through this. I always do, though it is fun to have something to complain about. As I said before, my production the past four months has been very good. We've just had the mildest winter I can remember in this part of the country. My family is healthy, and I'm able once again to walk without benefit of a cane (for modest lengths), so this is the closest to a complaint I can muster. PPPM.

I'll let you figure your own way out of that little slice of alphabet rubric. Thanks for dropping by, and leave a comment if you have your own writer dilemmas. Or non-writer ones. Cheers, and happy reading.

Pat Dale

A Writer’s Dilemma

What to keep and what to toss?

Of all the inner battles a writer has to wage, this one gives me the most grief. Early in my career, I felt obligated to toss everything into my opening chapter, including the kitchen sink. Of course, my first editor knew better and counseled me to go for brevity. Actually, a lot of brevity. Taught me the value of the truth that less is more.

Perhaps the main reason I told too much was fear of the dreaded hook. We all know it is vital to hook our readers from the very first sentence, but, gosh how are they going to be hooked if they don’t know the entire history of the main character? Stuff like that. Sorry. That was my feeble attempt at humor. Actually there are all manner of hooks, and the experienced writer loads them into her/his bag of tricks. Hooks are not my subject of choice today but would make a good subject for a future post. Now to get down to it.

Along the way, I had a chance for a few weeks of mentoring by a NYT best-selling author, and she taught me a lot. Interestingly enough, her advice was for me to gather all sorts of peripheral data to flesh out my protagonist before I wrote word one. At her insistence, I went shopping and picked out the kind of pen I’d find on her desk, the style notebook she kept handy, items in her home that she would kill to keep, etc.

I thought at first my mentor was daft. Why did I need to pick the china in her buffet, the clothes in her closet, the time of day she was most vulnerable to a case of the blues. On and on. By the time I’d complied with her instructions, the course was nearly over, and I felt cheated.

But, and this is a dandy, I sifted through all that stuff and, you know what? I suddenly saw my character as human, a person with strengths and weaknesses, passions, hungers, foibles, and aversions, to wit; a real living breathing, suffering, imperfect but lovable person I could write about.

I wrote the book. The final story won’t be written on that book in my lifetime, since I have no way of knowing how it will fare in the competitive world of fiction writing. But I wrote the doggone book and I’m proud of it, one of my best ever.

Now, back to my question. How much of all that periphery did I include? Not very much in terms of straightforward narrative, though understanding what kind of blouse she would wear for a certain occasion, or her favorite song, made her come alive in the pages of my book. So, my advice to fellow authors is, compile a book on your main characters. Don’t be shy, and don’t undershoot. This is your chance for that kitchen sink array.

You’ll ultimately, perhaps with the aid of a good editor, hone it down to the essence of what it is to be alive on God’s green earth. And, no doubt, your editor will give you a sharp paring knife to bring it into shape. I’ve included a partial list below, of the items I catalogued in developing Sera Moreland for my mystery novel, TOCCATA.

Happy reading, all.

Pat Dale

Partial List for Sera Moreland, heroine of Toccata:

Leather-bound stationery cover

Grandma Nadine’s silver piano shaped music box that plays Pavanne for a Dead Princess

Grandma’s French set of porcelain China, Festivite by Raynaud of Limoges that had been left to Sera on Nadine’s passing

Favorite colors for shirts and blouses, and sweaters: aqua, pastel pink, lavender

Business suits: charcoal and medium gray

Likes: all shades of blue

Dislikes: red (other than her Ferrari)

Extravagances: Luxury autos, Aston-Martin DBS and Ferrari, and Bosendorfer piano

Favorite music: French Impressionists, Debussy and Ravel

Lifestyle: Spartan. No house staff.

Sera is comfortable living alone, her only insecurity a repetitive nightmare stemming from an adolescent sexual encounter.

Editing Comparisons

Yesterday, I posted a blog on the Muse It Up Blogsite, talking about mystery writing and giving a bit of a teaser for the first of my St. Louis Blues Mystery series, TOCCATA, debuting in April.

After it was posted and I'd gotten a few responses, I received my line edits for the book. I'm extracting one example to give you an idea of the difference a few words can make. I am NOT trying to embarrass my editor. I appreciate all she and my other editors have done to further my writing. But I think, when you read this, you'll agree that one's voice can be seriously modified with even a minor shift in verbiage.

There's a reason my blog is titled Pat's Plethora of Poetic Prose. That is what I write, or attempt to write. Because there's a bit of the poet in me, I tend to allow the occasional flow of fancy in my wording. Also, as a life-long musician, rhythm is extremely important to me. Words are made up of syllables, and I use them to create rhythmic prose. Not all the time; that would be boring and eventually cloying.

The first example is the edited version. After posting this, I might have started with the original, so if you want to scroll down, you can read it first. Either way, I think you'll get the point after comparing the two.

Edited

Sera felt him deep in the heart of her, pressing them relentlessly onward as their spirits merged. The music pulsed, and he urged, then held her back. It was she who worked, he who set the pace, created the nuance, the power...the exultation!

She sensed their mutual climax approaching as her body trembled with excitement. She could only allow her soul to lift to meet it. Embrace it.

Revel in it!

Her fingers hammered out the final chords of Toccata, and the audience jumped to their feet, applauding wildly. When the piano’s strings had echoed into silence, she stood and faced the standing ovation. Her fantasy lover’s music had triumphed again. Debussy’s music and Sera’s performance — what a sweet coupling!

The crowd vacated Sheldon Concert Hall, she floated to her dressing room, her senses thrumming in the afterglow. Excellent performances were always this way. Wispy images drifted across her mind, much as her musical amour’s Clouds would have floated through a lazy nineteenth-century French summer sky. Music! What an aphrodisiac!

Original

Sera felt him deep in the heart of her, pressing them relentlessly onward as their spirits merged... The music pulsed, and he urged, then held her back. It was she who worked, but he who set the pace, he who created the nuance, the power...the exultation!

She sensed their mutual climax approaching as her body trembled with excitement. She could only allow her soul to lift to meet it. Embrace it.

Revel in it!

Her fingers hammered out the final chords of Toccata, and the audience jumped to its collective feet, applauding wildly. When the piano’s strings had echoed into silence, she stood away from the instrument and faced the standing ovation. Her fantasy lover’s music had triumphed again. Debussy’s music and Sera’s performance — what a sweet coupling!

The crowd called her back to the stage three times before the cacophonous chatter died away. As they vacated Sheldon Concert Hall, she floated to her dressing room, her senses thrumming in the afterglow. Excellent performances were always this way. Wispy images drifted across her mind, much as her musical amour’s Clouds would have floated through a lazy nineteenth-century French summer sky. Music! What an aphrodisiac!

***

Lest you think the only changes made were the words in blue, I took out about thirty other words that were marked for deletion. If you're having trouble seeing the difference, read the original again, out loud. The speaking voice will bring out the exact rhythm I strove to create.

Again, I do not wish to leave the impression that I'm criticizing my editor. I merely use this as a visual and (if you spoke it aloud) auditory aid in examining just how words can be made mundane or memorable with only minor changes. Multiply this by a dozen or so passages and, even in a major novel approaching one hundred thousand words, the writer's voice can be destroyed. Brevity is to be admired, but not at the cost of all the elements a good novel must contain.

I dare say, if one is only after brevity, then one should by all means, write a poem. That is the essence of the art of brevity; making the most of indelible images with the least number of words. But, just as with the spectrum of light, there is room for poetry in huge long works of the language art, as well as in the briefest of poems.

I'll get off my soapbox now, having no doubt ruffled more than a few feathers in places where they need not be ruffled. And in a few where, no doubt, they should. See, I can't allow everything to be a mere academic discussion. It's my damn Irish temperament. I know! I should stow my temper in my teapot.

Thanks for stopping by, and I'd appreciate any comments you have. Cheers,

Patrick Dale

A World with no Good Guys

What do you think that would be like? More to the point, what does that question mean to you? Nothing? Just another day at the office? Armageddon? What?

Because, that's exactly the world we live in. We like to pretend we're all good guys (by now you know I don't mean 'guys' in a gender sense). In some ways, we are, but we're also all bad guys. Note that I've not used the term evil in this context. This is not necessarily a case of Good and Evil, but merely of good and bad.

Take my protagonist, Adam Watson, from my newest release, The Evil Within. He is essentially a good guy who comes home to recover from some very bad experiences on the battlefield. All he wants is to go hunting in the little Eden he'd grown up in, and to be left alone.

With a reputation as a local good guy, he steps up to the plate when some clearly bad guys threaten a young woman in his presence. Little does he know they're there because of something a member of his family has done, and they're not the type to back off. One thing leads to another until all hell breaks loose. Literally.

Adam is back in a shooting war, right on his home town's main street. On the path from uncomfortable to unlivable, his eyes are opened to the reality that nobody he knows is free of the evil he'd tried so hard to avoid. When the smoke clears, he's left with a remnant of his family, an old girlfriend, and a lot of cleaning up to be done.

The Evil Within, offered by MuseItUpPublishing, is available as an eBook download at: www.tinyurl.com/7z9m97c and will soon be available for Kindle readers at Amazon.com or for Nook readers at Barnes and Noble.com

Search for Pat Dale, author at either site. caution: You are entering a no-win zone, rife with gritty, vulgar, violent scenes not for the faint of heart. Adult content, with a message you're not likely to forget.

Read THE EVIL WITHIN if you dare.

PD

A Writer's Universe: Inside or Outside

I've been relegated to observer status of late. A serious leg injury has necessitated my inactivity, so I've had lots of time to think. That's a dangerous thing for a writer. An idle mind is the devil's workshop, my grandfather once told me. Or was it, an idol mind? Hmm.

Many an author these days creates amazing outer worlds, with non-human characters, places, intrigue, etc. Fascinating for readers, especially those inclined to science fiction/fantasy. I even took one fanciful line and twisted it into an erotic fantasy, Blue Streaks. In the end, however, I couldn't help doing an unconventional twist into an all too true, down to earth, climax.

On the other hand, I find that the world which teases and tempts me the most is the one on the inside. How a character thinks and feels is more important than the derring do's and heaving ho's of life's little adventures. For the most part, my readers will find flawed heroes who demonstrate redeemable characteristics, more seriously flawed villains with little to redeem them, and strong women who follow or lead their heroes through thick and thin. No weak women for me, for I've never found that they exist. Strong women gone wrong, now that's a different tune, one I'll pipe all day and all night.

All of which leads me to the reason for this post. Fanfare, if you please, maestro! The Evil Within will be released on Friday, January 27, 2012. In Evil, you'll find a flawed hero, Adam Watson, who demonstrates a tendency all too many men will find uncomfortably familiar. He thinks of himself as a good guy.

Well, he is a good guy. Problem is, he's also human, which means he's got some inside plumbing in need of a good cleaning. Not physical plumbing, but spiritual. Before this saga is done, Adam learns more about his family, his community, and himself than is comfortable. Sorry, Adam, that's the way it goes in my book.

We also have not one but a plethora (there's that word again) of strong women, all with character flaws, but with the feminine wherewithal to hold life's little drama together when the seams pop. There is Sarah Reynolds, Adam's married sister, whose application for sainthood is on hold. Kelly Samples, a girl older than her years by a coon's age, and Amanda Moore, Adam's high school sweetheart, who turns out to be full of heart, but not so sweet.

Have I got a villain for you to hate? In spades, I do, and his name is Ramos. He does not deserve a last name and doesn't get one. What he does get in the end is something for you to wonder about. Oh, and the end is anything but happy for all concerned. Hint: keep a box of hankies handy when you read the last portion of this one.

Is this some kind of irreverent code, I'm blathering here? Could be, but you won't know if you don't read the book. Caution: it is not for the faint of heart, or those with tender feelings easily hurt. This is an adult novel in the manner of a Steinbeck, Hemingway, Lewis, or, dare I say, a Twain. In my view, we can still learn a thing or two from the classic writers of old.

What's inside your favorite character? Your favorite villain? Your own head? Look out. I may be lurking nearby, hoping for a little insight into what makes you tick.

Fair warning!

Pat Dale

Music: A Muse Builder

Have you ever tried writing while some good mood music plays in the background? I have, and it often helps me keep going when, otherwise, I might dawdle over some detail. I’m not talking pop music here. Each generation has its own favorites when it comes to pop stuff, but they often fade into the distant past within a few months or years.

What I’m talking about is ‘classical’ music; music for the ages. Just as each generation provides a handful of ‘classics’ that linger, so does the music of the masters. Only, with the masters, their music will be here for centuries, providing a continuum for music lovers worldwide. How will their music help keep your muse amused? Let me show you what I mean.

For instance, say you’re a writer of romances. You have to write a love scene and you want it to be sensuous, but not blatantly graphic. There are two pieces I like to use at a time like this. The more sensual is Rachmaninoff’s Second Symphony, Movement Three; the slow movement. If you’ve heard it, I don’t need to embellish its languid seduction of the listener. If you haven’t, you owe it to yourself to treat yourself to some of the most sensual sounds ever penned.

It begins with a poignant theme that repeats over and over, but not monotonously. As it builds, you can almost see two lovers who kiss, separate, kiss again as they entwine themselves in a buildup to an irrepressible climax. Then they settle into a few moments where you can sense the lovers enjoying the afterglow, before they're overwhelmed with the need to couple again, this time more slowly but rising to an even higher peak than the first. And, finally, a peaceful settling into the classic ‘love-death’. A word of caution here; if you listen to this for love scene inspiration, stop the recording immediately at the end, because the final movement begins with a bang.

The other piece mention is Gustav Mahler’s slow movement in his Fifth Symphony. It is less sensual than Rachmaninoff’s, but somewhat more extended. Also, it fires up the muse in a most romantic way. I’ve used both of these as I write the love scenes in my romances, and I highly recommend them to you. (Hint: They also are excellent to play in the background if you want to create a proper setting when romancing your own mate.)

There are many other examples of music that 'lights your fire', sensually speaking, of course. Debussy penned dozens of short and medium length compositions that can lull you into a world where your muse goes wild. Also Ravel as well as Frederick Delius wrote similar ethereal music.

Alas, the contemporary music world bombards us with such cacophony that Don Juan couldn't get it up for one of his conquests. Fortunately, thanks to modern technology, we are not captive to live performances. We can go down the street, waking or driving, with some midget device crammed into our ear, and enjoy the music of the ages. For me, the greatest thrill is to listen as I write yet another story.

My advice; try it. You might like it. Cheers, and happy listening.

Pat Dale

Pump Up Your Blog

AUTHOR INTERVIEW

Hi folks. Our guest today is Frank Scully. We’ll be discussing his Muse novel, EMPTY TIME. Welcome, Frank. Before we get into the nuts and bolts of your story, can you give us a thumbnail of the novel’s background universe? Oh, and tell us a bit about your protagonist.

James Lang is like so many people today. He works in mid-management in a large corporation, Intelligent, competent and hard working. Loyal to the company. A vital cog in the wheel, yet always slightly afraid of losing his job so he bends to the whims of the corporate leadership. Divorced twice, alone, estranged from any family, his whole existence is tied up in the company. Like a serf tied to the land and the lord of the castle.

Corporate titans today are much like the feudal lords of times past. They fight and scheme their way up a ladder of prestige, wealth, power and privilege. The major difference is the lack of a belief in a coherent code of conduct or moral precepts. Chivalry is dead. Working on a global scale beyond governments and borders, these new aristocrats are almost untouchable. The only rule they obey is greed. They are willing to employ any methods necessary to win. The prize is enormous wealth. CEO’s are paid huge salaries to bring in the numbers. How they do it is not questioned. The ultimate prize for a CEO is to take the corporation private and own it so they have complete control. Then they become icons to the rest of the corporate titans.

Many corporations today have more wealth than some countries. For a CEO who owns his own large corporation it is almost the same as being the dictator of a country. And it is far easier to take over a corporation than a country and less dangerous. In addition, there are more corporations. You don’t even have to own the corporation. Often, all you have to do is control the board of directors. CEO’s of large publically owned corporations today can get paid hundreds of millions of dollars a year even when the corporation is losing money.

James Lang isn’t thinking about any of that. All he wants to do is get through each day and hang on to his job. To not lose his place on the corporate ladder, maybe to move up a rung or two. So he will do the bidding of his masters even when he knows there is something wrong. He may have in the back of his mind a realization that there should be more to life than this but like so many wage slaves he is a prisoner to what passes for reality and success in the culture that surrounds him.

To take over a large leading-edge technology corporation three top executives are willing to commit murder and fraud to manipulate the stock market and the international currency exchange market. To divert attention and provide a patsy they set up Jim Lang to take the blame before he is to be killed and disappear. Disappear he does, die he doesn’t. He survives and discovers through the sacrifice of another that in order for life to have meaning he must be willing to give it up for something. To save the people he loves he must put his life on the line to turn the tables on his former colleagues.

That’s a pretty amazing scenario, Frank, but one we can easily recognize from the corporate world’s recent headlines. As far-fetched as it sounds, this world does exist and I suspect that many of us would relish a hero who rises to the challenge of bringing at least one or two of those corporate moguls to justice.

To some this may sound far-fetched. Unfortunately, after working in a variety of large corporations for almost 40 years, I have to say it is not. This exact story line may not have happened, but executives of corporations have manipulated their stock with impunity many times, colluded with government agencies for nefarious purposes, cheated to obtain lucrative contracts, and employed people or other corporations to get around the law or intimidate others. Now they have the right to spend unlimited amounts of money in elections. The Robber Barons of the late 19^th century and the feudal lords of the middle ages would be jealous of the power wielded by the corporate titans of today.

I simply use this as high concept backdrop for the story of James Lang, a man who finds his way out of the morass of empty time. Through good fortune and the help and sacrifice of others he learns that life has no meaning unless you are willing to give it up for something.

Well, I’m sure we’ll cheer James Lang on as we read your fascinating book. My guess is this one, with its worldwide scenario, was not easy to accomplish.

It was a fun book to write. It required considerable research, but that was part of the enjoyment, particularly learning about the waterways of Europe and those who work and live on them. That specific aspect is an essential part of the story. The waterways of Europe have been used for commerce for hundreds of years and still are. Boats of varying sizes haul goods all over Europe on these waterways. There are also boats that take tourists throughout Europe on the inland waterways. Many people live on their boats and do not have a permanent address. It is into this world that Lang disappears after the attempt on his life.

How in the world did you come up with such an engaging story?

I can’t honestly say how this story line came into my head. Ideas simply pop in and I follow them. Some are discarded if I don’t like where they go. Others I develop because I like where they go and enjoy the characters. What happens usually is a general theme or story line will come to me. Sometimes it comes with a set of characters, sometimes without. I write it down and start developing it. What theme or message is it trying to express? Who are the characters and what is their backstory? What is the crime and how does it play out? Without a crime how can it be a mystery/thriller? I may spend a few months ruminating over a variety of story lines before any of them make it to the stage where I am ready to settle on one to be the next book. I may be writing one while I am thinking about the plots for several to follow.

You certainly have raised lots of intriguing questions here. Would you elucidate your writing process for us?

Once it makes it past the initial stage, I will start doing more detailed notes on the characters, place, crime, time lime, and other aspects of the story. However, I do not do an outline. The prime things I want to know before I sit down at the computer are the characters, the crime, the setting and a general idea where I want to end up. Once I am comfortable with that, I work on the first few paragraphs. Developing that hook is the hardest part. So much rides on capturing the reader in the first few paragraphs.

Once I am past the first chapter, the book tends to flow. I allow the characters to come to life in my mind. It is almost like a movie starts to run in my head and my job is to get it down on paper. As the characters and the story move along I have at times found that the story and the characters will take different directions than what I originally had intended.

I don’t wait till I complete the first draft for re-write and edit. Each day, as I start to write, I go back and review what I wrote the previous session and do some editing as well as checking for consistency in the character and the story. Once I am done, I set it aside while I work on something else. I need to let it get out of my head for a while so I can approach it with a more open mind for the final editing and re-write.

Sounds like a pretty complicated process, but one that yields very satisfying results for certain. I’ve read your other novels so I don’t have to ask whether this is your first. How many books have you done now, Frank?

I have now completed six novels and am working on my seventh. EMPTY TIME is the third one published by MuseItUp Publishing. RESURRECTION GARDEN was the first, DEAD MAN’S GAMBIT was the second, and BLOOD SINS, the fourth, will be coming soon. All are part of what I call the Decade Mystery Series. I am writing at least one novel set in each decade from the beginning of the 20th century to the current time set in different locales with both continuing and new characters in each one. There is something unique in each decade that marks it as separate from what went before or what follows. I explore aspects of what is unique as it is expressed in the locale chosen and how it affects the culture, characters and the tenor of the times and yet also see the common humanity that never changes.

All are available from Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Smashwords and other online eBook retailers as well as the publisher’s bookstore at: https://museituppublishing.com/bookstore2/

Well, Frank, I’d like to thank you for dropping by to visit with us today. You’ve shared a bit of your book and your writing regimen. I feel we know you a little better now, and I’m also sure we’ll want to visit a site where we can pick up a copy of EMPTY TIME and cheer James Lang on. Best wishes for a successful career as a novelist.

About the author:

Frank Scully was born and raised in a small town in North Dakota and received a Bachelor’s degree in History with Phi Beta Kappa Honors and a Juris Doctor degree in Law from the University of North Dakota. He then served more than five years as a Judge Advocate General Corps Officer in the U. S. Army in the U. S., Vietnam, and Thailand. After that he attended the prestigious Thunderbird School and received a Masters in Business Administration with honors. In his professional career he has worked as an executive with large aerospace and defense manufacturers and also owned his own small business.

Depending on the vagaries of the universe he has been well off at times and broke, but never broken, at other times. Blessed with an understanding wife who gave him twin sons, he has remained through it all a dreamer whose passion is writing stories.

Website: www.frankjscully.com

Thanks for dropping by. Please leave a comment if you can. Happy reading! Pat Dale